How a Still, Small Voice Changed My Life

 

I am not going to lie, making the decision to come to do a DTS was one that I made out of haste and desperation. I pointed my sinking ship of a life towards land as a last resort, hoping that I would get there before going down. I was exhausted with my circumstances and the choices I had set before me. Every choice that I had laid out seemed wrong and unfulfilling. I was so discouraged by where I was in my faith, and I was so tired of being one foot in and one foot out.  I saw YWAM North Cascades online after a friend told me about YWAM. As I read over the website I prayed, “God, is this what I am supposed to do?” and I felt some type of peace. Some would call that a confirmation. I applied at 2:00 AM on a Monday night (morning?) the summer before my DTS. 

 

Arriving at my DTS, I hadn’t thought a lot about what it would be like. I was so focused on getting there and getting out of my circumstances that I didn’t really have set expectations, but I knew that I wanted this experience to change me. The first week of DTS our lecture was on hearing God’s voice, which is something I was completely new to. Our speaker, Jen, said, “I am sure all of you have heard the voice of God before, it’s a matter of recognizing what He sounds like; discerning what is His voice and what is your voice.” When I applied to DTS months before, my own voice and my inner dialogue was all over the place. I had asked God to give me direction, but I didn’t hear a big thundering voice saying, “The LORD hath said you shall goeth to DTS.” But I soon learned that throughout scripture God speaks in many ways, not just audibly. 

 

To my surprise, His voice sounds a lot like a conversation in my head, except He doesn’t talk like I do. His voice is encouraging and reassuring. He does not condemn me, but instead speaks gently. I remember after that week I was able to start recognizing more of the ways that He would speak to me – in the moments that I quieted my mind and silenced my inner critic. I also started to see that He could speak through other people and through scripture or while I was praying, or even while I was washing dishes. And He speaks to you too. Listen. Ask Him. 

 

On outreach, He spoke so much about family. Every time I would look up from a circle of kids singing, “Jesus loves me,” He would say, “These are my children.” Every time I would sit and wash dishes with their mothers He would say, “These are my daughters. ”I began to see the world differently. As we listened for God’s voice, He would always speak of His love for His children. Our privilege was telling them and showing them how much the Father loved them. This is something I will never forget. 

 

This realization has changed me. When I put on the lens of the Father’s love first, it changes the way I see and interact with people. I am by no means perfect at this, but every time I make the decision to, He speaks. And when He speaks, I am changed.

 

It is not difficult for Him to hear us, it is not hard for Him to speak. It’s easy, but it takes both sides of a relationship for good communication to happen. If you don’t know where to start just ask Him, He is here and He is with us.

 

Take courage in the words of Jesus, “My sheep hear my voice, and I know them, and they follow me. I give them eternal life, and they will never perish, and no one will snatch them out of my hand.” (John 10:27-28)

 

Written by Kaylee Hewitt